Slog PM: Beto Takes the Bus, Seattle Loves ‘Stache, Has the Blob Returned to Kill?

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Also, the Sea Owl, a $75 million super-yacht owned by Trump-financing CEO Robert Mercer, is currently docked near Gas Works Park.

Also, the Sea Owl, a $75 million super-yacht owned by Trump-financing CEO Robert Mercer, is currently docked near Gas Works Park. Eli Sanders

A killer marine heat wave may be forming off our coastline: The new heat wave resembles the killer “Blob” that murdered sea life and wrecked salmon in 2014. The two waves appear to be very similar, but it’s unclear if this wave will cause the same amount of devastation as the 2014 Blob, reports the Seattle Times. That Blob killed “MILLIONS OF ANIMALS, FROM SEABIRDS TO SEA LIONS” (caps courtesy of me).

Influential dork takes BoltBus to make a point: Beto O’Rourke took a BoltBus from New York to Boston and called his seat “very comfortable” and “spacious.” An O’Rourke spokesperson told Washington Post reporter Dave Weigel that they were taking the BoltBus because it is “the lower carbon option.”

Remember that epic 2019 government shutdown that caused poop overflow in national parks? It turns out the Trump administration violated federal laws “when it tapped entrance fees to keep the nation’s national parks open during the 35-day shutdown earlier this year,” writes Politico. The finding came from the nonpartisan Government Accountability Office, which released a statement today saying “the administration played a shell game with national park money in order to keep parks open.” That shell game apparently violated federal laws.

The Liberty state folks are at it again: Proponents of dividing Washington state along the Cascade Mountain Range had a meeting yesterday in Moses Lake to “clear up misconceptions about the movement.” The organizers described the two-state solution as a “win-win” for everyone. Just join Idaho already!

Dorian won’t die: The eye of Hurricane Dorian is currently passing over parts of North Carolina, reports the National Hurricane Center. The hurricane is weakening as it heads north, but it remains a powerful storm. As with all hurricanes, the twisters are what often get ya.

A sea mystery: An underwater observatory vanished from a restricted area off the northern coast of Germany, reports the BBC. Officials say it couldn’t have been dragged off by a storm or sea creature because it was too heavy. The observatory was measuring seawater quality and “the data we get from it is priceless,” said the head of oceanographic research at a scientific center in Kiel. Whodunnit?!

What the hell is happening with Brexit? Boris Johnson had a strange press conference and everyone is generally confused. The Guardian has a live blog with the latest updates, but they described the presser as “rambling and shambolic.” More: “That was the most extraordinary prime ministerial press conference we’ve seen for years—perhaps not quite as dramatic as Theresa May’s ‘nothing has changed’ meltdown, but certainly more peculiar.”

Sticker patrol: Beg buttons suck, but this is cute.

The Baltic Room has a new owner: It’s Rachel.

And what about Joe? Joe thinks Sound Transit needs to hurry the hell up with this fare enforcement review.

What’s the deal with Trump’s $50 million loan? And is it evidence of tax fraud? Mother Jones has a big investigative feature on Trump’s shady and embarrassing finances. I haven’t read the whole thing yet, but my first question is about this picture they use of the Trumps:

Seattle loves the ‘stache: From mutton chops to mustaches, Seattle loves facial hair—apparently. Dumb story, but here are the top 10 facial-hair loving cities…………….

1. Chicago
2. Atlanta
3. San Francisco
4. Los Angeles
5. Seattle
6. Portland
7. Austin
8. New York
9. San Diego
10. Philadelphia

This story is still happening: I’ve been refusing to engage with it but this seems comprehensive. As a living filter, sometimes I have to create random boundaries between me, our president, and his technically newsworthy behavior. But here you go.

There’s still time to egg Robert Mercer’s yacht: He’s the Wall Street CEO who bankrolls demons like Steve Bannon. His yacht is currently in Lake Union. I’M NOT SUGGESTING you EGG HIS YACHT, I’m just saying THERE’S STILL TIME TO DO IT if you knew WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE and WHERE IT WAS. But it would be TOTALLY IRRESPONSIBLE to use my platform to suggest you EGG HIS YACHT that “FEATURES A HAND-CARVED ‘TREE’ THAT TWISTS THROUGH FOUR LEVELS OF DECKS.”